Project Everlasting success in JAPAN!

Last summer, Japan released a translated version of our Project Everlasting book and we are grateful to announce that it was a national bestseller for the first few weeks on the shelves. It's not the NY Times, sure, but it still felt good to know that our labor of love was well-received internationally.

Here are some testimonials from some of our Japanese readers...

Hello Jason, Thank you so very much for you email! I did regret not writing my name in the comments section, so I'm really glad you asked. My name is Anna. I came across your book one night at a neighborhood bookstore, while I was in search of another book. While I was in search, my eyes were drawn to your book. When you suddenly come across an unexpected book,it's destiny :)

So I picked it up. Since the topic was something I've been pondering about since my early childhood years, I thought it would be a great hint for life. So as soon as I started reading, I couldn't stop turning the pages. I was intrigued by the many truths unfolded, and simply enchanted by those true love stories. Now I understand what my mother meant when she told me that love"takes time". I guess love is like a big piece of painting that requires, patience and faith to turn into a masterpiece. But always with lot's of fun :D

I just want to thank you again for the consideration to ask for my name.And another thank you for working on such an amazing book.Please give my regards to Mat too. Have a fantastic night!

Hugs and Peace from Japan,
Anna

***

Dear Mathew Boggs, Jason Miller, Grandma Dorothy,
I'm Japanese, I read your book in Japanese. It is wonderful book, I cried for some stories, and Grandma Dorothy with raining. I laugh at Mathew and Jason's comments. The translation is very good. I think Japanese can also learn a lot from your book. I'd like to watch the DVD, so I hope to sell it with Japanese subtitles. Thank you.

Best Regards,
Akiko Koga(female)

***

Dear Jason and Mat,
Hi! My name is Chika and I am from Japan. I bought your "Project Everlasting" book which is translated in Japanese. I was going to buy some other books and looking around the bookstore. Then this fantastic book just caught my eyes! Really nice hardcovered book with a very interesting title! Two bachelors to find the marriage masters across the States? My first impression was "No way!" I was really curious how you could find such couples and what you both would do with these people! This two questions just led me buy the book!

When I got back home, I immediately started reading! Within a day, I even finished reading half way. I decided not to read whole entire book within two days, so I read one chapter in a day. Trust me, it was really hard to close the book since each story really has a lot of meanings of love. I am also single woman and living with my boyfriend. Although these stories are coming from marriage masters, it still gives great advice on my relationship with him. I am actually practicing many advice on my relationship. Of course, some are not easy to follow, but I am doing my best!

I wanted to let both of you know that I am really grateful to meet this book and now I am really looking forward to having a family with husband. Again, thank you so much!

Warmest regards,
Chika

Love Notes: Spring Cleaning & Thoughts on Change [April/08]

April 28th, 2008

Spring Cleaning & Thoughts on Change

Ah, the great practice of spring cleaning and rejuvenating...

Mat and I are just now emerging from a short nap in our respective bachelor caves where we each took opportunities to go on retreat and gather thoughts and creative energy. Coming back together, we then challenged ourselves at a Men's Leadership retreat. After that, Mat spent some quality time with Bob Proctor (The Secret) to become a Life Success consultant and Law of Attraction presenter (more on this later).

On a personal level, I packed up my boxes and moved up north to Washington state. The change-up absolutely rocked me. As in (and I'll borrow a line Mat and I heard more than twelve times at Men's Leadership): I WAS LIKE A SCARED LITTLE BOY.

For two weeks straight, the process of going through my things and facing ten hundred little-decisions-that-appear-to-be-huge-decisions (like, whether or not to toss the collection of iron-on decal t-shirts I so very much treasure...) tormented me into a "don't call me, I'm le'depressed" attitude. I made Mat's life hell (running a partnership with someone who doesn't want any more decisions, never mind communication, is rough). I was a scared, ungrounded little boy. And so I kept the iron-on decal t-shirts. All twelve of them. So there.

But now that I'm finally moved and unpacked and absolutely loving my decision to create a new home, I look back at those two weeks of self-torment and (a) laugh at myself, and (b) take a moment to reflect on lessons learned. One of the insights I found may help to serve you in your interpersonal relationships -- including the one with yourself -- today:

We are all wildly dynamic Beings...act accordingly.

My 30th birthday was in March and it capped off a winter of dramatic spiritual upheaval for me. During that transformational period of four or five months, I entered into new relationships with new friends (and love interests) which reflected my...oh, we'll call it "spiritual courageousness". Essentially, I was more daring with my authenticity, more lovingly, outwardly focused than usual (it was at this time that I met Nathan Turner on the streets). For those new friends coming into my life, the snapshot of me was a grounded, peaceful Jason.

Enter Hurricane...um, Trevor.

You know what they say about first impressions, right? Hard to forget. But if these new friends would have seen me during my two weeks of "like a scared little boy" packing madness and t-shirt decision-time sadness, they would have had a hard time reconciling the "change" they witnessed in me. I did not match the snapshot they'd taken of me prior; I simply was not me.

Enter Compassion.

My beautiful new friends continued to love me, despite my altered, less enjoyable personality, and for this I feel grateful. They exemplified the kind of compassion Mat and I saw so many times in our couples who'd not only gone the distance, but gone the distance enjoying one another's presence. As we say in our workshop, the Marriage Masters continually give each other a soft place to fall. How good does it feel to know that no matter how challenging my personality may become, I am loved by the people who choose to see the Truth within me at all times? Incredible.

It's my prayer for you, wildly dynamic person, that you are creating and maintaining each of your relationships with unflinching compassion. It's time to check in...to observe how you handle change in your relationships...and decide whether or not your attitude and behavior are serving you in your quest towards true love.

Have you ever heard the saying "A woman will choose a husband thinking she can change him; a man will choose a wife thinking she'll never change"? Have you noticed how true that is in the folks around you? Better yet, have you noticed how that may be playing out in your interpersonal relationships? Are you allowing your mate to grow and expand his/her creative expression...or are you resenting him/her for not being the person you first met and fell in love with? And, finally, are you giving yourself permission to shed old skin, old beliefs about your role and place in the world and in your relationships with others...

The question is: are you being Present in your relationships? When we get grounded and look at our mates in the present, we do not compare them to yesterday's version and ask, "Why can't he/she be like that again?" Or, "How can I change him/her back?" Rather, we ask, "How does God see him/her?" Then: "How can I see him/her like God does? How can I show understanding for where he/she is at right now?"

And remember: we are wildly dynamic beings. Change is absolutely a good thing, even if it means losing the [insert your attachment here; iron-on decal t-shirt collection, for instance]. Because look, let's face it, a marriage that lasts 40+ years isn't inherently pleasurable -- Mat and I witnessed this more than once, unfortunately. Forty years of stasis in any activity is a good prescription for...eh...death(?). A passionate marriage is the union of two passionate beings who both commit to compassionately supporting one another's growth and change. The Ruth and Eddie Elcotts (click here to watch their segment from our documentary film) of the world are lifelong mates who remain madly in love because they're growth-oriented individuals who commit to expressing themselves as authentically as possible -- and change is the truest form of authenticity I know of! And, sure, sometimes they piss each other off (all the time, actually), but at the end of the day Eddie looks at Ruth and sees her light shining brighter than ever, and realizes that she is annoying, yes, but bea. Meanwhile, Ruth looks back at Eddie and can't help but shake her head and say, "Divorce? Never. Murder? Often. But I can't get enough of you and I love you back."

So before you run off to do your own spring cleaning (or at least become okay with the idea of spring cleaning and change), check out this insight from Victor Frankl:

"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."

May your relationships flourish due to your loving embrace of change and growth. Be well, my friend!

With love and gratitude,

Jason Miller
Co-Author and Producer of Project Everlasting
Projecteverlasting.com

Ruth & Eddie Elcott, from the documentary film and Chapter 2 of Project Everlasting: How do you keep from driving each other nuts?